bitterdiva

Equality in life

... or my life as it applies to Yin and Yang

Over the weekend I lost my wallet including the 120 that was inside it. That money minus 20 was to pay the phone bill. I lost it in a grocery store right before I decided that I wasn’t going to pay it that day since the line was way too long. If only I had decided to pay it either before shopping or right after maybe then some creepy lowlife wouldn’t have made off with undeserved money.

Yesterday my precious returned to me, thanks to the folks of the US Postal Service. I typically always had to thank the USPS for many things, like giving my mother and father a job; which enabled me to have a roof over my head and crappy clothes to wear, along with setting me up with years of debt so I can head off to a good college, but I digress. Someone, probably after taking my money, dropped it into a mailbox so the leather bound uselessness could be returned to its rightful owner.

Now plagued with bad karma it lies in my purse. This weekend when I am in the wonderful state of the silent “C”, I’ll go searching for it’s successor, something that’s quite similar and holds onto my car keys. After all, if I lose my wallet I can’t go anywhere if my car doesn’t go anywhere. I’ll also make sure that when I’m at the grocery store again, they don’t confuse me with their whole switching of the carts.

I’ve been having some surreal dreams lately. A culmination of reading Gaiman’s Coraline and having a mélange of people from the past and present dance their way across my dreaming stage. Last night the old MegaBitch appeared, she who makes me cringe when I think about her; she who is the reason I do not venture off into her town when I’m home.

Typically I’m a fearless person who gets into a mode and says screw my friends and those that read this bloody site. I often talk about how much I dislike a person; the injustices, fears and weaknesses of the diva. However, sometimes I’m too weary to talk about something because I don’t want to hurt my best friend or the people with whom they associate.

If it’s one thing I am certain of, I do not do well with females that pose a certain risk to myself. I do not appreciate rival females and I often have a hard time understanding and associating with them. Of course I have a couple female friends (two to be exact) and I have my sister and of course my coworkers. I don’t feel threatened by them for some reason. I would think that of all those that I’m not threatened by the main person would be my sister. She’s the epitome of what I want to be: attractive, intelligent, witty, social and the desire of many men. However I am not. It must lie in her interactions with people and her personality. I am completely different from her. She’s 70’s Disco and I’m 90’s Grunge. She’s Tiffany’s, Paris, Maeve Binchy whereas I’m Target, London, Neil Gaiman.

I worry much about what others are thinking about me and how people talk about me. I guess today it’s a curl up in my shell day. Many people have different perspectives on me: easy going, fun, and compassionate; hard to approach, stern, and belittling; eccentric, spontaneous, and witty. I am ruled by my mood some days.

Just took the Keirsey Temperament test, apparently I’m an Artisan.

09:49 AM

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