bitterdiva

"It's nothing 800mg of Ibuprofen won't cure"

I preface this update with a please forgive me, I’m hormonal and out of my mind.

I don’t know if it’s just been the shitty weather, whether it’s my hormonal system, but I feel like I’m losing my mind yet again. I feel stuck in the middle between worse and shit. I am a person that needs to let things just remain in the past. Dredging up old feelings about anything drives me into a frenzy until I completely lose it and end up smearing my feces on a wall.

I have exactly 15 days until my last final, wonderful Organic Chemistry! I’m finished with The Short Story with a resounding Hallelujah! Luckily for me I managed to pull out of my scientific ass an “A” in an English literature class. How I did it, I wouldn’t have a clue. My papers, I believe, are sub par and I lack flowery language and descriptions and insight to produce a masterpiece. My thought pattern is logical and I base all my ‘interpretations’ on facts. My professor even commented that one of my papers were simply logical. I just want to say that sometimes a kid riding on his rocking-horse is just a kid riding on his rocking-horse not some euphemism about masturbation.

Speaking of masturbation, May is National Masturbation Month. So guys, do your bodies good and get those arms going! May is also a month to other national causes, such as: Bicycle Safety Month, Scholarship Month, Book Month, and Mental Health Month. Every bloody month is home to some type of cause and it’s really annoying me of all the observances we should have. So here’s my list of what each month should be:
January – National Better Yourself Month
February – National Beat Yourself Up for not Bettering Yourself Month
March – National Summer’s Around the Corner You Better Lose Weight Month
April – National All These Showers are Depressing Me Month
May – National Slack Off from Classes Month
June – National Pissed Off About Summer School/Classes Month
July – National National Month along with National I’m Moving to Alaska or Canada Month
August – National I Don’t Want to Go Back to School Month
September – National Angst Month
October – National Horror Movie Month
November – National Depression Month accompanied with National Serotonin Month
December – National I Hate These Fucking Holidays Month

So it’s May, where the hell have the last five months gone? The last thing I clearly remember is puking my guts out in a toilet New Year’s Eve. Now it’s May? I thoroughly enjoyed the lack of snow and mild temps but it’s May and I’m still wearing sweaters and long sleeves. I want bright sunny days in the upper 60’s or beautiful thunderstorms or pouring monsoon rainy days.

I want a lot of things. I want my heart to stop aching. I want to get my degree. I want my financial status to be better. I want these fucking cramps to end so I don’t have to remain in the fetal position for 3 more days. Most importantly, I want a vacation.

11:32 AM

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